My mother went to great lengths to ensure her best efforts were put forward in raising her three children. Not only did she consult the ancient manuscripts such as the Bible and Dr. Spock…she also went straight to the experts. We spent countless hours listening to specialists in the field of life experiences hence this blog entry:

What I Learned From Bill Cosby

-Monsters are real and should be avoided at any expense even if you have to cover the kitchen floor with Jello®

-Blankets can protect you from most common monsters

-Mom’s believe in monsters and will help to protect you, but not all dad’s do

-A snowball left in the refrigerator will usually be thrown away by your mom before it can be used for revenge

-Revenge seldom works out for good

-It’s okay to be friends with overweight people…they can really come in handy in certain sporting venues

-Don’t stand directly behind extremely frightened overweight people

-Everything you need to know as an adult you DON’T learn in kindergarten

-The only thing you do learn in kindergarten is how to say goodbye to your parents and basic bathroom skills…you know—like how many fingers to hold up if you’re going a number one or a number two

-Kindergarten teachers train children for adversity by giving them pencils as large as horses legs, paper that still has wood floating around in it and lukewarm curdly milk with dry crusty stick-in-your-throat graham crackers

-A child old enough to attend school does not need an afternoon nap

-The only person napping in a room full of kindergartens will be the teacher

-Going to bed at three in the afternoon does not make Santa Claus come any sooner

-Dentists are sadistic…that’s why they make you talk when your mouth is dead

-Don’t complicate childhood, it’s the only simple time of life

I can still remember sitting down in the living room and Mom putting the needle on those wonderful old 33 LP records that so uniquely shaped my young life. Thanks Mom for caring enough to give your children the best education we could afford. And thanks Mr. Cosby for teaching me the truly important things in life. And if you’ve never listened to the original stand up work of Bill Cosby…you’re missing out on one of the great CLEAN humor works of the past